Alaska Tourist Quotes - 12 Quotes from the Last Frontier!

12 Incredible Alaska Tourist Quotes!

Ahh....the Alaska tourist quote.  Being born and raised here means I've heard my fair share of these.  Couple that with the fact that I worked for the National Park Service in the visitor center of Denali National Park in the summers, I've heard several that almost make you cock your head to the side like an inquisitive canine that is seeing something new for the first time.  The presence of a spiral bound notebook of hand-written Alaska tourist quotes from the National Park staff can neither be confirmed nor denied :) We recently put a post up on our Facebook page asking for the best from our fans who have heard these with their own ears.  We do this from time to time, and it always rewards me with some good reading at the end of the day.  Scrolling through these can make a person chuckle, sigh, furrow their brow, or wonder about how some of these folks might go about their daily lives! These posts certainly aren't made to poke fun and laugh AT people, but to laugh WITH people.  I've come to the conclusion that the purveyors of the infamous Alaska tourist quotes are oftentimes in such awe of Alaska (and for good reason) that sometimes they might just say whatever comes to mind at the moment, without taking the time to think about what they're saying.  We have all been guilty of this in some form or fashion, so while these are funny, we could also have a bit of patience with the tourists who visit Alaska and want a taste of what we get to enjoy on a daily basis.  ENJOY! Alaska Tourist Quotes Denali


  Alaska Tourist Quotes Moose

While deer on the roadways are certainly an issue, I'm not sure a 150 pound deer is as much of a hazard as a 1,000 pound bull moose!


Alaska Tourist Quotes River

Typically in Alaska, our rivers flow downhill.  I can't speak to other areas, but that's how it works here....


Alaska Tourist Quotes Bears

No take-backs!  We bought this land fair and square for 2 cents an acre! #bestdealever


Alaska Tourist Quotes Island

While we do have bridges here, its a little known fact that Alaska is ACTUALLY connected to Canada....who knew?!


Alaska Tourist Quotes Snow

Shoveling it up and storing it in the 'snow warehouses' is definitely a burden on the community.  There has to be a better way!


Alaska Tourist Quotes Northern Lights

Only when we want to.  We can be stingy with the 'Aurora Switch', and you have to be nice to us!


Alaska Tourist Quotes Moose Deer Alaska Tourist Quotes Elevation

At the same elevation where bears turn into squirrels, sheep into goats, caribou into marmots, etc.  I thought this was common knowledge?  Yes, this has been asked multiple times....eesh!


Alaska Tourist Quotes Rain

Alaska DOES have more coastline than the rest of the US (by a WIDE margin), so maybe since we touch more saltwater this was asked?  Fortunately for us, it still rains freshwater...and the plants are thankful for that.


Alaska Tourist Quotes Highways

Fresh snow might stay on the roads for longer than some people might like, but our guys don't get THAT far behind!


Alaska Tourist Quotes Rocks

Another little-known fact about Alaska....we grow big really, really big rocks!


Alaska Tourist Quotes Pipeline

Believe it or not, the oil isn't actually in a metal barrel...while its in the pipe :)


Alaska Tourist Quotes Moose Eating Salmon

Moose...still herbivores in Alaska!

  Enjoy this?  Let us know!  We can certainly do more of these!  


This makes me so sad. Wow!

Laura April 17, 2021

Reminds me of London Underground (Tube) humour. Customer, “How long is the next train (going to be)?” Staff member,m" Oh, about six cars."
Customer, " the train is full, I can’t get on." Staff member, “There’s plenty of room on top.”
Customer, “Victoria?” Staff member, “No, I’m called George.”

The worst I’ve heard was recently in Blackpool. Customer, “This is a really small halibut, the ones that Jane Kilcher catches are much bigger than that.” Staff member, “Jane Who?”

Glenn O' Brien April 17, 2021

Born and raised in Ketchikan- the “First City” (as in the first stop on Alaska cruises). I got the strangest questions… Standing on the cruise ship dock- “How far above sea level are we?”. Working the cash register in a tourist shop- “Do you take American money here?”. Giving a tour in a resort van- “When are the whales performing?”.
The BEST ONE: At the grocery store I overheard a lady and her family ask a cashier “What would be good bait to get a close up picture of a bear?” Straight faced I leaned in and said “Your children”. I laughed all the way back to my car!

Amy Balenzano April 17, 2021

My husband works with a guy that travels south a lot. One time down in the lower 48, a cashier found out he was from Alaska, and asked it she could see some Alaska money. He put his hand in his pocket, pulled it out, and said, “Dang, it melted!”

Chelly Bennett April 17, 2021

I have pictures of some friends at a swimming pol in Fairbanks in 1956. I believe it was close to 90 the 3-4- days we were there.

gene moffitt April 17, 2021

sad but true……I have heard adult Alaskans born and raised here ask those same elevation questions.

sue April 17, 2021

Trust me. They ARE like that on a day-to-day basis…

Maggie Sullivan April 17, 2021

We moved from Fairbanks Alaska to Texas and it feels like a different world…from Heaven to Hell but people always say “Oh my God, you actually drove all that way.”

Michele April 17, 2021

As Postmaster if Seward, I heard this one all the time.

Jeanie Burtch April 17, 2021

But seriously, I’m sure there is a way to Calculate the Weight of the Denali formation. I for one one would be interested in knowing.

Tim Dye April 17, 2021

When I was moving up here from Texas, we stopped at a store in Louisiana, (the long way via TN to visit family). The girl behind the counter asked where we were going and we told her Alaska. She said, “Wow! That’s a whole nother continent!”. Ummmmmm no, not really. :)

Mary April 17, 2021

We used to get this all the time on the boats in Seward. We’d usually look over the side and say about 4 feet….. most would catch on that it was a dumb question at laugh at them selves.

Cassie April 17, 2021

We moved to Anchorage in 1980 from New Orleans, La. When I attempted to change my address with the Insurance Company out of New York, I was told that my coverage didn’t extend to a FORIEGN COUNTRY !!! LOL
Also, my Mom waned to know if we had INDOOR plumbing & if we had to use BOTTLED GAS? LOL

So hated to havee to moe back to the Lower 48. Still miss Alaska

Linda Glory April 17, 2021

Overheard a tourist on a cruise ship complaining that the glacier was dirty, and why wasn’t it cleaned before the ship arrived.

Sue April 17, 2021

I was taking a friend out to eat halibut for dinner. He asks “Are they are going to put the whole fish on the plate?”

Angela April 17, 2021

Best quote I have is a tourist asking if we take American Money. I auto responded " nope furs and beads only". The look on his face was priceless.

Hillery April 17, 2021

At my “going away” party, in ‘93, it was known i was moving to Bethel, AK for a job opportunity. After an evening of stories about pipes above ground, houses on stilts & almost all “honey buckets” being replaced, one of my more “intelligent” g/f’s asked if i had to renew my passport!

ANGELA MUNDT April 17, 2021

Best ever. I was asked by a woman for an Alaska astronomy book because she wanted to know if we only have full moons in Alaska… I wanted to say yes, and that the state is populated by werewolves.

Julie April 17, 2021

A few years ago met a girl on a bike on the tidal flats about 5 miles south of Juneau. As she was leaving she commented about there being more uphill than downhill on her way back to Juneau cruise ship terminal. She was allowed to have her bike on the boat as she worked as a naturalist on the tour ship….

raija wilson April 17, 2021

People (tourists) can’t be THAT stupid, can they????? Awful and I was a tourist. I just love Alaska and have read about AK. since I was a kid!!

Sue DePalma April 17, 2021

I remember being down on the dock in Juneau meeting one of the Alaska Steam ships coming in with my Grandfather, that question was asked by a woman of my Grandfather and he said about 1500 ft. and the woman bought it. The dock was at most 15 ft. above the water. This was back in the early 50’s don’t think it has changed much since then.

Ted Tisdale April 17, 2021

Years of driving tour buses in Alaska I have heard many long forgotten…but this one stands out – “Do you really hit moose on the road?”
Or having watched me load luggage before departure this one was always great – “Driver, will our bags get to the hotel at the same time we do?”

Karen April 17, 2021

Hilarious. Thank you

Gloria April 17, 2021

I took a call as police dispatch a few years ago. The tourist wanted to report “There are bears out by the river. Just running around loose!” Yes, Ma’am, that is where they live…

Rosalie Loewen April 17, 2021

As a kid I moved from Alaska to Nebraska and was asked if I was a foreign exchange student or there “forever”. Must not have been forced because I’ve since moved back.

Jim April 17, 2021

Leave a comment

All comments are moderated before being published